Rantings of a 12-year old mind

Sometimes I wonder why do we have five fingers? Why not 6 or 7 or perhaps, 12. Why is it that our body is perfect for the way it is?

Sometimes I wonder why does the alphabet ‘F’ sounds like ‘fa’ and not ‘ka’ , ‘sha’ or perhaps, ‘ sa’. Imagine somebody saying, “I don’t give a s(f)uck.” Or maybe, ” I don’t give a d(f)uck.” Funny, yeah.

I wonder why is white called white and not red, and red called red and not black, and black called black and not orange? Perhaps, orange is the new black. Whatever.

P.S. My 20-year old self did not write these utterly lame words but my 12-year old self did.
I found this written in a very old diary and no wonder, I had a stupid childhood.  😛

Wander – Wonder

Sometimes I wonder, what would it be like to live in a secluded place, perhaps a lesser known village in the lesser Himalayas?
One of the little things I want to do in life is to peep out of that window (like that child), indite the music of the winds, smell the heavenly petrichor, admire the serenity of the environment and stare back at those magnificent mountains.
*sighs*

IRONY

Why do “balls” equate to toughness and “pussy” equates to weakness when even the slightest flick to the nards sends a guy to his knees and contrarily, vaginas can push out an entire human being?
IRONICAL. Yes, it is.

Cruelty and Love.

People often ask me that why am I apprehensive about love and commitment and stuff. Those who don’t know me think that a bad or a hurtful past has made me so callous about love. Those who know me think I’m weird. But whatever it may be.

In bloody 20 years of my life, why haven’t I been committed to anyone? Why haven’t I felt the pangs of love? Why hasn’t Cupid struck me? And why hasn’t Aphrodite bestowed her blessings upon me yet? WHY?

I too have been pondering on these questions since a long time. And after a few moments of introspection, I have an answer. A perfect one, a real one. Basically, my answer is priorities.

My priorities are different from those of others. To me, love is a pious thing ( ‘thing’ ? Nah, an emotion). If someone loves me with all their heart and I am unable to love them back with an equal intensity and fervour, then it will be cruel on my part. Yes. Taking all the love from someone and denying them their part of love is, in fact, the most terrible form of cruelty.

And I can’t be cruel to anyone. I can’t make anyone suffer because of my ‘different priorities’. Hence, I’m rocking the solo life, happily!

– Bhavya

NORMAL?

Because there’s abnormal in normal…

Scraps

AN ESOTERIC KISS

Goosebumps and butterflies.
In my stomach at his sight.
When he came closer, my heart sank.
My pulse dropped, to be frank.

The adrenaline rush engulfed me.
While his lips touched mine.
It was so surreal that I skipped a beat
But that moment was divine.

The taste of his lips was intoxicating.
And the caress of his fingers stimulating.
His breath touched the pores of my skin
While I could taste him within.

Our bodies enveloped perfectly
Leaving no blank spaces.
I could feel him. He could feel me.
Dearest Cupid was leaving traces.

Was it love? Was it lust?
I ask myself often.
I don’t know whatever it was.
This esoteric kiss will be veiled in my coffin.

• – BHAVYA RASTOGI

I wrote this for YOU.

I want you to know that I’ve written this for you. Only for you. So that you can read it. Everyone else who reads it doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. These words are meant for you. Truly, only for you. For you are special. You are beautiful. 

I want you to know that there will be no fears or tears after you read this. That you will emerge as a stronger person. That you will gain mental strength from these words. That these words will become meaningful only after you read them.

I want you to realize that there are happy memories as well as unhappy ones. That you need to forget the unhappy memories. That it is not easy but you can try. That you need to remember only the happy moments of your life. That reminiscing them will bring a smile on your face. That your smile is the most beautiful thing.

I want you to believe that the bad days will end soon. That the gloominess of your life will be over one day. That the darkness will fade away. That after darkness will appear a ray of light. That that light reflects hope and happiness. That that light is within you.

I want you to realize that people come and people go. But some people stand by your side, no matter what. That they are there for you even in the darkest phase of your life. That they are the ones who truly care for you. That you need to realize their worth. That you need to stop chasing wrong people. That nobody stays with us forever. Because nobody is immortal. But the only immortal thing in this world is YOU. Your Soul. That your soul is pure and beautiful. That it reflects the obscure –‘you’.

I want you to know that life is not easy. That it has innumerable obstacles and hurdles. That you need to go on despite all the barriers. That you can’t give up. That you have to fight for yourself. That you are strong enough to do that. That with your perseverance and confidence, you will win it one day. Trust me.

I want you to believe that everything around you is beautiful. That beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. That the sun sets each day. That that sunset is beautiful. That the sun will rise the next day. That that sunrise is beautiful. That rains are beautiful. The rivers are beautiful.

And so are you. Keep smiling always!

– Bhavya

The Semi-colon effect

Choose to be a warr;or

Choose to keep going, with your heavy heart over-flowing

Choose to never stop till your last tear-drops

Choose to be perseverant while life is being reminiscent

Choose to be a WARR;OR for the labyrinthine path has innumerable barriers

Choose to love endlessly because souls around us are in melancholy.

– Bhavya

Never choose to end the sentence; because you are the author and the sentence is your life.

Unveiling the veil!

It has always been so confusing when I’ve been asked to write about myself. If someday someone asks me for how long have I known myself, I wonder what my answer would be? Maybe NEVER or maybe FOREVER! Well, you’ll get to know me through my pieces of writing on this blog but for the sake of social obligation, here’s a brief:

I am Bhavya Rastogi, 20. I am a simple girl leading a simple life away from parties, drugs, expensive belongings but near to books, movies, music, television, nature, and maths. Oh! Did I just mention MATH? Oh yes. Having pursued my graduation in B.Sc. (hons.) Mathematics, I am a Math- freak. I love algebra, trigonometry, geometry, arithmetic, calculus and what not. Strange combination -mathematics plus blogging- yeah.

Before I forget to mention, I am a feminist with a firm belief in gender equality. My feminism not only includes women but transgenders, LGBTs and ‘men’ who’ve fallen prey to the patriarchal society. I like to have discussions about gender equality, politics, religion, history, business, philosophies of life, humor, wordplay. My blog is a mixed bag of my emotions, political and economical issues and feminism.

To me writing comes as naturally as breathing. It is a rambling of my mind. As Hemmingway aptly puts it:

‘There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.’

I started this blog to keep myself away from the stress and agony of life. It is a way for me to pen down my emotions and opinions and share it with people around the globe. So, I hope to have an enriching experience while learning here.

Thankyou for stopping by and reading. Stay happy.

– Bhavya