Cruelty and Love.

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People often ask me that why am I apprehensive about love and commitment and stuff. Those who don’t know me think that a bad or a hurtful past has made me so callous about love. Those who know me think I’m weird. But whatever it may be.

In bloody 20 years of my life, why haven’t I been committed to anyone? Why haven’t I felt the pangs of love? Why hasn’t Cupid struck me? And why hasn’t Aphrodite bestowed her blessings upon me yet? WHY?

I too have been pondering on these questions since a long time. And after a few moments of introspection, I have an answer. A perfect one, a real one. Basically, my answer is priorities.

My priorities are different from those of others. To me, love is a pious thing ( ‘thing’ ? Nah, an emotion). If someone loves me with all their heart and I am unable to love them back with an equal intensity and fervour, then it will be cruel on my part. Yes. Taking all the love from someone and denying them their part of love is, in fact, the most terrible form of cruelty.

And I can’t be cruel to anyone. I can’t make anyone suffer because of my ‘different priorities’. Hence, I’m rocking the solo life, happily!

Bhavya

Move on with life.

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Approaching into the fog. The fog that will engulf him. He’ll be swallowed. But what will remain are the tyre traces on the sand. The tyre traces will fade too with the wind. And what will remain is a memory of him. Of the things that happened and vanished.

So, stop looking for traces but the memories, that are perpetual.

– Bhavya

Sadness prevails

Some days you are sad for absolutely no reason.(No reason? Are you kidding me? You have every reason in the world to be sad.)

Your heart is heavy and you look for a dark room or perhaps, a washroom to cry your heart out so that nobody, absolutely nobody can see your endless tears and drenched cheeks. Your eyes are filled with tears and you hide them behind your ‘feigned’ smile. You feel broken and fallen apart. But at the same time, you do not want anybody, particularly your loved ones to know about your state. And if somebody sees you in that dark room, accidentally though, you turn your face away and wipe off your tears before they come to notice. Your inner self shouts out at God for your current state but there’s absolutely no answer. This shout-out relieves you, for a few moments though.

You want to be alone. You want melancholy. But can’t because people around you need you. They want your presence.

So, in the end, there’s no escape.